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Mx. Luna Corbden 馃惛
@corbden@defcon.social  路  activity timestamp 2 years ago

So many of these people I interact with on NextDoor simply haven鈥檛 thought it through. It鈥檚 amazing.

When you figure out how to detect and handle actual abusers, you find all these people who just mimic abusers because they haven鈥檛 been exposed to any other way.

Asking questions really is a super power in these troubling times. Don鈥檛 argue, don鈥檛 debate. Ask questions. It opens up everything. If they鈥檙e a genuine abuser or fascist, they will show their colors to everyone. If they鈥檙e just a follower, it gets them to think it through, sometimes for the first time. Even more, the attention you show can get them to trust you, let down their guard, and then anything you say can be actually heard.

(I might post screenshots later. But I have to take this slow to take care of myself.)

#NextDoor #AbuseCulture #CriticalThinking

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Mx. Luna Corbden 馃惛
@corbden@defcon.social replied  路  activity timestamp 2 years ago

I wish I鈥檇 had a better hang of this approach while my dad was still alive. I had just started trying it in earnest just before he got sick. It did lead to greater connection and understanding between us, just in time, but only briefly.

There鈥檚 a sense that asking a question, giving the other person the floor, is handing them power, but that鈥檚 an illusion. It鈥檚 incredibly powerful to get them talking along the thought-lines you鈥檝e nudged them towards. It empowers them, too, especially if they鈥檙e being controlled by a cult or abuser. It is a mutually empowering act.

#NextDoor #AbuseCulture #CriticalThinking #SocraticMethod

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