For context, my cognitive capacity has notably declined in the past few years, both on a general trajectory and including episodic worsening that's phenomenologically separate from the #MECFS #BrainFog.
Several times in the last 24 hours or so, when my eyes have been closed, I've experience contradictions between my belief about the position I was in and the physical reality.
For example, I'm lying on my side, and all the physical cues are there, like pushing against the mattress, but my mind is convinced I'm lying on my back. The only way out of it has been to open my eyes.
Then it would happen again after I closed them.
I woke Jalan at some point last night telling her, "I'm fearful." I really am.
As horrific as the severe ME/CFS is, my cognitive function worsening at the same time is fucking terrifying.
Not for nothing I'll point out Dragonlet is not quite nine years old.
