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Neil Brown
@neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago

The UK Environment Agency has some tips for the public to help conserve water, including

> Deleting old emails to reduce pressure on data centre servers

I kid you not.

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/england-faces-5-billion-litre-public-water-shortage-by-2055-without-urgent-action

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Jay Peach
@jaypeach53@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil 😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
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Programmer 832-529 🍅
@smallsees@social.dropbear.xyz replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil
Emails mean storage
Storage needs power, which needs cooling and therefore water.

But it would be a rounding error.

Seems like a very oddly specific thing.

Now, how about all those companies trim down all the unnecessary personal data they horde? That might make a bigger difference.

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Elliot
@elliotblackburn@fosstodon.org replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil "Please consider the environment before saving this email." 🤦
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rootfs.ext2.gz
@rootfs@mastodon.online replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil is this page usef-NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT
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Hedders
@hedders@mas.to replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil I missed this when you first posted it. Possibly because it appears to have made my brain kernel panic with its sheer bone-headedness.
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~n
@nblr@chaos.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil In the 90s some people used to have "Made from 100% recycled electrons" e-mail footers… in 2025 satire eats itself.
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AspiringLuddite
@AspiringLuddite@medievalist.masto.host replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

This is, pardon my language, fucking outrageous.

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Death by Lambda
@xdydx@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
A large PLC that I consult for insists on attaching a 32kb image promoting their environmentally conscious efforts to email, not just the first one in the thread, and not just externally either.

The maths is over my head, but I conservatively estimate that my Outlook #macro that strips attachments from emails has probably saved them more money and reduced more carbon than any of the green initiatives in their list. (And yes, I do actually get that many emails from various departments).

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bewitchedmind
@bewitchedmind@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil A few years ago a German minister wanted people to stop uploading food photos in order to save energy.
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The Penguin of Evil
@etchedpixels@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil But if you plot a graph of emails sent per day along side extreme weather they go the same way !
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M. Hamzah Khan
@mhamzahkhan@mstdn.intahnet.co.uk replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil All my email has been deleted. I hope everything is better now. Do I also have to delete backups?
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Lucy B
@linuxlucy@mastodon.org.uk replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Did an AI tell them to say that?
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Marcel_Gehlen (he/him)
@Marcel_Gehlen@social.tchncs.de replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil these are the same mechanisms, which creates our individual co2 footprint, so they can offload on us to buy our hazelnuts unpackaged while companies and billionaires get richer by torching the earth.
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oheso
@oheso@ieji.de replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil @CyclesSmiles **scrrrttcccchhhh!!!**
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Murat Cem Mengüç
@mcmenguc@mstdn.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil I am sure banning protests, punishing activists and protecting apartheid would solve the problem.
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Jay
@WhiteCatTamer@mastodon.online replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
Old and busted: Be kind, rewind.
New hotness: Be neat, delete.
Radical, unthinkable: Be sane, constrain.
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A Flock of Beagles
@burnitdown@beige.party replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil petitioning UK parliament right now to tell everyone which is heavier, a pound of lead or a pound of feathers.
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Diane
@alienghic@timeloop.cafe replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

Speaking from water limited southern california, has your government considered requiring your water treatment processing to process water to drinking water standards?

If people find recycled water icky, it can at least be used for irrigation. (And maybe cooling too)

(I'm picking on the wastewater because there seemed to be some very serious weaknesses in the capabilities of the privatized water companies)

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Flits
@FlitsFlash@floofy.tech replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil ..so getting rid of all those data centers would help even more, right?.. right? neocat_hyper
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Andrew
@cinebox@masto.hackers.town replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil few people know this but emails are a kind of freshwater fish
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BillionaireBourguignon
@mhanson101@union.place replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil no comments on the massive surveillance and data harvesting operations though. Just clear your inbox please.
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SpaceLifeForm
@SpaceLifeForm@infosec.exchange replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

It makes more sense to ban AI.

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gkrnours
@gkrnours@mastodon.gamedev.place replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil did thry ask chatGPT for that tips?
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Dragon
@Dragon@toast.dragon2611.net replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil be better off telling people not to ask an llm a question
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Leigh Silvester
@leighms@mastodonapp.uk replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
And delete all pictures and videos of cats.

In 2015 it was estimated that 15% of internet traffic was cat related.

https://blog.purestorage.com/perspectives/how-much-of-the-worlds-data-is-cat-content/?print=pdf

In 2010, it was also estimated that there were about 1.3 billion cat pictures on the internet. They all require storage and assuming each image is 1 MB, well that's a lot of data storage.

We definitely don't need any more cat photos. We know what they look like and they are just manipulating you. They are not cute. They devastate wild life and just want to shit in your slippers or leave vomit on the stairs.

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Basil
@basil@sarcasm.stream replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil please consider the environment and print off this email.
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polly
@quercus24@mastodonapp.uk replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil I kid you not... Tell me that you dont understand maths without telling me you don't understand maths 🤯
Sorry, no caption provided by author
Sorry, no caption provided by author
Sorry, no caption provided by author
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Otte Homan - remember Geordie
@otte_homan@theblower.au replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil OC source ... https://www.abc.net.au/news/2025-07-15/greater-western-water-data-centre-proposals-foi/105529020
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Otte Homan - remember Geordie
@otte_homan@theblower.au replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil maybe send UK Environment Agency this link?
https://rssfeed.media/@abcfeeds/114853222911121315
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kel
@kel@mastodon.online replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

They sold off the reservoirs - now they're whining like spoiled children!

This is yet another rip off to put money in the shareholders pockers!

https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/news/water-firms-sold-off-reservoirs-that-could-have-helped-ease-drought-331977/

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Otte Homan - remember Geordie
@otte_homan@theblower.au replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil simply banning AI datacenters is probably too hard. Instead, recommending to collect all the turds in the toilet and only flush at the end of the day is so much easier.
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Roy -- the dull one
@oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

A few years back, one of the strong suggestions was:

Water your garden by peeing there.

(Actual government recommendation from one of the London 'burbs.)

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Mike P
@FenTiger@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Clearly someone got the wrong end of the stick when they first heard the term "cloud provider".
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Sandor Spruit 🇪🇺🇳🇱🇺🇦🇨🇦
@sandorspruit@mastodon.nl replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil @thomasfuchs I read today that a new Facebook data center will require 5GW of power, but I am sure every email deleted will help a lot #sarcasm 💪🏻
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Graham Sutherland / Polynomial
@gsuberland@chaos.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
Your browser does not support the video tag.
GIF
GIF
Futurama GIF. A space ship drops a giant ice cube into the ocean. Caption reads: we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean now and then
Futurama GIF. A space ship drops a giant ice cube into the ocean. Caption reads: we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean now and then
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lin11c
@lin11c@toad.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
This is so interesting! It makes sense I guess.
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Nicole Parsons
@Npars01@mstdn.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

How does a country with a reputation for constant rain, end up with a fresh water deficit?

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Nux
@Nux@fosstodon.org replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Thames water currently loses over half billion litres of drinking water every single day because they prioritised shareholder value over infrastructure (and UK gov let it happen). They can go fsck themselves.
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Reddog
@Reddog@syzito.xyz replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Water companies are spilling millions of litres through leaky pipes, selling off reservoirs, putting shit in our seas and rivers...... And I have to let my garden die to save water... fuck them.
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David Palk#RejoinEU 💖🇪🇺🤎🕊
@Palky55@mas.to replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Is it an advance on 'share a bath' ? Asking for a friend.
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Sassinake! - ⊃∪∩⪽
@Sassinake@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

We are going to 'tech' our way to oblivion.

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BowieChilde
@BowieChilde@cupoftea.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
Sorry, no caption provided by author
Sorry, no caption provided by author
Sorry, no caption provided by author
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elala@nrw.social
@elala@nrw.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
I don't even know where to start ... 🤪 😬
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rozodru
@rozodru@social.vivaldi.net replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil all my long abandoned gmail accounts must be absolutely THIRSTY right now.
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lfzz
@lfzz@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil next they will try to prompt their way to a solution. Thankfully this AI thing doesn't require cooling right?
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drukac
@drukac@historians.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil
But also don't decrease demand for data centre storage because Kapitalism.
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micha
@micha@23.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil @bert_hubert maybe they think those mails are in contact with water because the providers need to scan them for hidden messages ... 🫣
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groff
@geoffl@mastodon.me.uk replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil I use ad blockers and reader mode to save the planet, honest.
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Queenofcorn78
@Queenofcorn78@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

Water-scarce communities and regions
are putting pressure on data centre
operators to reduce their water usage
significantly and to implement solutions
that ensure a more efficient use of
water for cooling purposes.

https://uk.allianzgi.com/-/media/allianzgi/globalagi/editorial/sustainably-quench-the-thirst-of-data-centres/1271-23-1039-allianzgi-thirstydatacentres-global-eng-2023.pdf

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Andrew Smith
@smiggs@freeradical.zone replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

I guess AI is supposed to consume a load of water, so if we just delete the internet problem solved.

Black Guy tapping head meme

Caption: AI can't steal your content if it doesn't exist
Black Guy tapping head meme Caption: AI can't steal your content if it doesn't exist
Black Guy tapping head meme Caption: AI can't steal your content if it doesn't exist
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Ian Douglas Scott
@ids1024@mathstodon.xyz replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Are we sure this recommendation wasn't just made up by a government official looking for an excuse to delete emails with evidence of corruption?

"I deleted them for mother nature! Totally selflessly. I'm not hiding anything."

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食 Shoku the MN Wolf
@TheMNWolf@furry.engineer replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil they should recommend using smaller fonts to save on disk space as well 🙄
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abadidea
@0xabad1dea@infosec.exchange replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil the internet is a series of water pipes
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Alex Haydock
@alexhaydock@infosec.exchange replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

It's hard work being this environmentally conscious but it's nice to get some recognition from the Government finally.

A screenshot of a sieve filter for emails.

It reads:

```
# Expire all emails after 6 months
expire "day" "182";
```
A screenshot of a sieve filter for emails. It reads: ``` # Expire all emails after 6 months expire "day" "182"; ```
A screenshot of a sieve filter for emails. It reads: ``` # Expire all emails after 6 months expire "day" "182"; ```
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Ryan Walmsley
@Ryanteck@fosstodon.org replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil tis fine, just ask AI to do it.

Lots of savings of water then.

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Daniel Durrans
@dan@mastodon.durrans.com replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil did they get this list mixed up with their “how to get rid of the evidence” list?
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Dan Sugalski
@wordshaper@weatherishappening.network replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil Ah, they're proposing relying on individual action to solve systemic problems, something that never in the history of humanity has failed spectacularly to work.
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Andy Price
@andyprice@mastodon.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil I hope this email finds you conserving water by deleting it
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Paul_IPv6
@paul_ipv6@infosec.exchange replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil

the truly sad thing here is that i had no doubts about this being from the UK govt...

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Extreme Electronics
@Extelec@mstdn.social replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil They will be suggesting burning plastic to save on recycling next.
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Ret
@ret@furry.engineer replied  ·  activity timestamp 3 months ago
@neil brought to you by the same political class that suggested rolling out guard dogs to bark and deter drones over Heathrow…
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Hedders
@hedders@mas.to replied  ·  activity timestamp 2 months ago
@neil Well, maybe. But let's go back to the part where some sub-Ollie Reeder policy dweeb came up with the "delete emails" thing, and wasn't immediately tarred and feathered by everyone in earshot.
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