I promise I’m not a terrible person, but if you eat my food without asking me first, I will cut you
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@farah A (now former) friend kept stealing chips from my plate. They'd asked for 1 and on the 5th or 6th I asked them to stop but they kept "forgetting" and stealing more.
Eventually I said "If you swipe any more chips, I'll stab you with my fork".
A few mins later, friend swiped another chip "forgot" and I tapped them not-hard with the tines of my fork.
You'd think I'd murdered them by the noise made. But they never took food off my plate again...
@farah
Totally correct reaction.
If you ask, 9 out of 10 times id actually give it to you. Begrudgingly, sure. But at least my food plans won’t be ruined
@farah
So, if I eat your food, I should ask permission before you find out?
@farah AS YOU SHOULD
