Seeing the Torvalds take a stance of "AI" is useful, don't deny it... Seems like the perfect time for me to embrace the escapism of my hypothetical computers!
Imagine a vectorized 32bit CPU running off of a couple SD-card (or cartridge) slots, with a raw memory-mapped peripherals? Maybe it'd fallback to booting into a Lua interpretor, or whatever language you prefer.
A joystick & 2 buttons for primary-input, eink & optional screenreader for primary output, controls on a dumbphone?
1/3?