@Smidgybit
Ha! The answer to that question is itself a rabbit hole 😄

There is no shortage on self-hosting guides (and opinions!), but you may find this rather comprehensive guide a good starting point https://binarytechlabs.com/self-hosting-ultimate-guide/

This site has good and clear tutorials on specific projects, for example Pixelfed https://pimylifeup.com/raspberry-pi-pixelfed/

I often find my own projects are a mix of various guides, as opinions and preferences differ as much as approaches. The result is that one guide may cover everything you need, except they use Nginx as the reverse proxy, and you want to use Caddy or Traefik, and now your setup falters.

Persistence pays though, and it's HUGELY satisfying when you launch your private equivalent of a Big Tech platform, from a humble Raspberry Pi in your living room, knowing that there is ZERO tracking and profiling, and YOU hold the strings.

My first project was @snikket_im, a federated and decentralised WhatsApp/Telegram etc. alternative. I'm now in my 7th year of running it, and the sense of freedom and liberation it gave me has never gone away.

@_elena