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A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording to add to our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien explained, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
Seeing my confusion she continued “Our system has shown that somewhere, a few meters from this exact location a moment of peak synchronicity and happiness is … inevitable.”
The alien gazed at me expectedly. I gazed back, stunned to silence.
“It’s not you, is it?” Said the alien.
Slowly, I shook my head “no.”
And of course, I could not be the subject of a moment of “peak happiness” what could be more absurd?
2/
As if to confirm this, the alien looked sharply up to a regiment of a leaf-cutter ants, each one carrying her green prize like a flag along a slender branch on the margin of the rainforest. To my eye they all looked identical, but the alien trained her holographic recording device on one particular ant.
“This one.” the alien said. “this ant has just cut a perfect portion of the leaf. It has a perfect level of moisture that will exactly match the needs of her colony.” 3/
“She knows it is not possible for her leaf to be delivered any more swiftly to the mandibles of her sisters. Peak joy.”
I could not deny it, for all that the ants were identical. The ant did seem to lift her tiny legs just a little bit higher.
She was at the center of some rarely glimpsed but vast and beautiful machine: her black compound eyes drinking in the green of the midday forest, it was singing back to her “You are going the right way! You have a purpose! You fulfill it by being!” 4/
The alien let out a long wistful sigh, “Isn’t it wonderful? Don’t you wish you could know what it was like?”
This surprised me. “I think someone with an important job like yours, archiving happiness in all the known universe might know what it was like.”
“my job isn’t that important” the alien said “if I had my act together, I would work for a more significant division… like the one that records moments of perfect suffering that’s considered to be a more serious & important area of study”
5/
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