@tknarr @alice

My own family members say things with racist subtext literally all the time

@alice as a cis white male growing up in USA, I can unequivocally agree.

I think I've always seen bigotry, a little, but the micro aggressions, the constant everyday bias, was less visible.

Until I noticed it in myself.

And realized at twenty something that nothing was gone. Except perhaps some overtly legal protection for bigotry.

But now that I know where to look? Everywhere!

@alice Last year we discovered my partner was allergic to (among many other things) a very specific ingredient found in a lot of soap products (shampoo, conditioner, dish soap, laundry detergent, moisturizer, etc.) Sometimes it's not even on the ingredients list! Even products specifically meant to be hypoallergenic and for sensitive skin.

Also queer, disabled, food sensitivities and limitations...

Yeah. This shit is real.

@alice the point about that for me is that I truely don't understand what motivates those people, and in this I have some form of symapthy for peoples ignorance. It simply doesn't fit these people's (mine included) perception of society - not even closely - so it feels like you are talking about some other species. This makes it all the more important to ensure that everybody affected by this human garbage has a chance to be heard. Especially by people with the power to do something about it

@bjb @alice

There are a lot of people who don't see it in the physical world either. Women often don't talk about these things in public. I'm not victim blaming. There's lots of reasons for that, not least of which is a credible fear of retaliation. Probably other reasons that I'm not aware of, too.

Men, of course, rarely see gendered abuse and so can ignore or deny it if they choose. Even abusers, incredibly, do this.