Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Ask Me About Birds pin. Most of you probably don't know this, but I have a PhD in Birdology. Ask me any bird-related question and I will be happy to share my extensive knowledge of beaks and feathers.
https://collabs.shop/r5tmqs
Discussion
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@lowqualityfacts I know the bird is the word, and the word is god. Is that the reason the non-avians are fucked?
@lowqualityfacts Are questions about bird law allowed?
@lowqualityfacts I have often wondered how penguins keep their tuxes so spotless.
@canneddirt Antarctica has the highest concentration of laundromats in the world.
@lowqualityfacts @canneddirt That's why it's so white. It's all that bleach.
@lowqualityfacts
I don’t know if you’re into “why” questions, since bird folk tend toward the “what, where, when”
But, WHY are birds so often named for their LEAST observable characteristic??
Like, red-bellied woodpecker? Wtf?! And butter butts have the least buttery butts!
@lowqualityfacts
When do Cedar Waxwings frequent NJ
@lowqualityfacts A question I have always had about birds such as canaries, for example. What is the main reason for their singing? In nature, making sounds is often dangerous.
Many say they sing to mark their territory, others say they do it to attract females, and others say it is because the bird is happy.
Why do birds fly and bulls can't? Their name both start with "b", they should be similar.
@max Bulls can fly, they usually don't because they are very bad at landing.
@lowqualityfacts what is that annoying little shit of a bird that goes "totsitotsitositosi..." in 3AM and NEVER STOPS!
@patricos It's just a weird rooster.
@lowqualityfacts which is the most birdy birb?
@meercat0 The penguin birb.
@lowqualityfacts
Are there any bird species bigger than Big Bird?
@zvinj No. There is actually a species of bird called Biggest Bird, but it is smaller than Big Bird.
@lowqualityfacts @zvinj The Lesser Biggest Bird is bigger than the Bigger Lessest Bird.
@lowqualityfacts @zvinj
This seems completely consistent with most bird naming conventions 👍
@lowqualityfacts Which birds flips the best? I have some flipping the bird I need to do, and would like recommendations from a professional.
@tankdigital The Bearded Reedling. It is perfectly round and loved to be flipped.
@lowqualityfacts There are a few species of bird that don't fly. Do birdologists know why that is?
@tuckerm They can fly, but choose not to due to religious beliefs.
@lowqualityfacts That makes sense, thank you.
@lowqualityfacts whats the most interesting bird you saw
@Artafernes A crow named Tom Cruise. No relation to the actor, and they were around the same age.
@lowqualityfacts how ? I remember birds cannot live that long
@lowqualityfacts This is kind of a big question, but who is Big Bird related to? I hope this is the kind of bird related question you are prepared to answer.
@quietmarc He is related to both a canary and Andre the Giant.
@lowqualityfacts Which birds make the best drinks?
@flipper Pelicans, they can shake up a surprisingly exceptional espresso martini in their big ol' beaks.
People used to respect birdologists. People used to seek my wisdom and bring me gifts. But sadly, everyone just uses AI to answer their bird questions these days.
@lowqualityfacts Are all birds bastards? Or do just think that because I live in Australia? I've spent more time birds' beaks than I have in my owner's nose.
@chrisp Yes, but in Australia they are bigger bastards.
@lowqualityfacts What are birds? Are they like analog drones?
@smutmag Excellent question. Birds are dogs.
Hence the term "bird dog"