My 'I wasn't wanking when I thought about you' tshirt is raising more questions than it's answering
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I can't wank into a big salad without thinking of you.
Every time I get one of those giant cheques for One Million Pounds I think, Ben would love this. I well up slightly and Timmy Mallet or Kris Akabusi just assume I'm overcome by the moment and give me a little cuddle.
We're doing OK here, hope you and the fam are too x
@TwoClownsEating @TheBreadmonkey
Might have known it'd be you two that caused this toot to cross my vision with no context.
You are both very silly and I appreciate this!
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating
I'm pretending to be all "Tsk, those boys" but really I am giggling like a child
I do worry that my mix of earnest posting, whimsy, overly long pointless stories and music nerd posts, don't always alert unsuspecting new followers to the occasional bouts of pornographic surrealism that can occur sometimes.
@TwoClownsEating @PetraPhoenix @TheBreadmonkey this is the content we’re here for!
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating I’m thinking about Mat not wanking as we speak.
Ha! Jokes on you, you can think what you like, doesn't change the reality.
@TwoClownsEating @TheBreadmonkey You know what they say: even a stopped clock is right when Mat has wanked himself to a state of exhaustion.
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating
Those parentheses and all caps is raising a lot of questions already answered by those parentheses and all caps.
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating This NOT WANKING part feels needlessly detailed. Couldn't we just have some vague "thoughts and prayers" vapid non-statement instead, please?
My 'I wasn't wanking when I thought about you' tshirt is raising more questions than it's answering
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating You said "raising" <snort>
I'll note that Mat has said NOTHING about this which means he must fear losing vote share in the coming London elections (L not R) to Reform or the Green-Tory alliance and the military-cyber-industrial-ballet complex (not Wednesdays)...
@TheBreadmonkey @DamonHD @TwoClownsEating
It was one of those "It never occurred to me that this might not be true until you said it was and now I don't believe it" statements.
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating And obvs I am disappointed and my lawyers will be touching your lawyers in due course.
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating That and the marbled background print.
@TheBreadmonkey @TwoClownsEating I am both insulted and horrified and indignant and then horrified again about the first sentence