Morning reflection: becoming an adult isn’t about getting older, but about learning when the time comes to "disengage". When the stream of thoughts, disagreements, integrity, that feeling of being right, turns into a simple "OK".
Not because you changed your mind, but because you understand that continuing to argue won’t change it either.
And so that OK is both an ending and a beginning: the end of the discussion, and the start of putting into practice what you believe anyway.
Discussion
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@stefano I’ve always seen it as that point when you accept the consequences of your decisions.
Of course, some people never become an adult…
2 sides of this coin: you can either become a sweet loving old man or a bitter angry old man. I imagine the sweet old man just says OK. I strive to be this type of old man. One day maybe 😊
@thedaemon me too. It’s so full of angry old men that I don’t want to become one of them.
According to Carl Jung, the second half of life is not a decline. It is a different psychological journey altogether. The first half is about building a place in the world. The second half is about discovering who you are without the world’s applause.
@yuhasz01 wise. Beautiful.
Jung quote about aging is why I take issue with people's comments dismissing Trump due to his being an old man.
HE IS NOT! He acts like a misguided sociopath, teenager and has not matured or learned anything about life.
I'm adult enough to that with everyone except my nearest and dearest. The argument just comes out before I take a breath. Well, maybe I hit 50%. I'll have to pay attention and see. That might actually help, especially if I take note of saying "OK" when it happens. Positive feedback does seem to work better for this sort of stuff.
@ajlewis2 doing this with closest people is - by far - much more difficult
@stefano science suggeats it is also a biological transition via developmental stages. A teen thinks very differently from a 20yo because of nature. That said, some seem to struggle to behave like adults whatever their age.
@stefano your energy, and mental health,are finite resources.
absolutely agree - realizing that, and that you can put those resources to better use - signs of maturity.
Bonus points if that "better usage" eventually lets you rub the proof of how right you were all along in "their" faces!
(ok I might still have some growing up to do)
@kaasbaas exactly. A wiser use of those energies means: a better way to demonstrate you were right, without spending too much time & energy just trying to prove it by discussing 😆
@stefano same... I got asked recently why I don't care about some things anymore and stubbornly do some things others obviously think of being silly or not worth the effort (like regularly go out and clean up our beach).
I replied "oh, I do care but the older I get I decided to chose my own battles more wisely". Maybe I'm a bit like the German proverb goes "telling lies into my own pocket" but atm it feels right.
@Tionisla this is a wise approach.
@raven It's hard, anyway