I just added this fantastic essay by @catileptic about relationship anarchy to my bookshelf¹.
🔗 https://catileptic.tech/posts/relationship-anarchy-technology/
I'm bad at summarizing, so here's a quote I love:
"The impulse to control others grows when we perceive ourselves to be powerless, threatened, precarious. We might be tempted to exert control directly (over individuals) or we might support state or military control. The paranoia that makes us distrust others and seek to subjugate them is fed by the myth that everyone around seeks to do the same to us. It is nonetheless possible to stop before overflowing from self-protection into dominating others. It takes the awareness to establish when one is safe enough."
Go read the whole thing now!
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¹ https://teunvanson.eu/bookshelf/