Shout-out to the co-worker who, when discussing new EFF swag for the store says, "Give me your worst ideas. I want only your worst ideas." We are going to have so many thongs, guys.
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@evacide
Man-pasties
@jonhendry Pasties, like thongs, are gender-neutral.
Ah, of course.
"Tactical pasties"?
@jonhendry Strategic pasties.
@evacide
With big red functional launch buttons
@evacide Privacy thongs.
@evacide please tell me someone responded with "my worst ideas are too powerful for you, traveller"
@evacide I'm just here to vote that I LOVED the art deco vibe to last year's defcon shirt and the green zippered hoodie this year at defcon.
@evacide American thongs or Aussie thongs?
@evacide to be fair an EFF thong is no weirder than the Northrop Grumman thong
@evacide Stoppppp … you're making me miss the days of working for a giant 501(c)(3) orgization.😆
At #SFC, we do ≤ 2 swag items per year.
Although, upside is that my “worst idea” won this year: I hope everyone enjoys their refillable 14 mL #SoftwareFreedom Conservancy hand-sanitizer.
Also, we bought in bulk so you're gonna get those things for the next 5 years, all.
Cc: @Susan_calvin @cmccullough
@wakame @cwg1231
@varx
@steely_glint
@rowmyboat
@spiegelmama
@ExplodingLemur
@yetzt
@not2b
@evacide
Both Foot and Hip models available?
@evacide branded Tile/AirTags. Because if there is anything that screams privacy it is voluntary tracking solutions!
@evacide lock picks. EICAR test string qr code two inch badges. Sandals with matching woollen socks. Things that look like pocket knives but don't have any blades. Rollable and washable Bluetooth keyboard ties (bonus points if you do piano, qwerty and Dvorak). Butt plugs with a micro SD card slot. (And no electronics). Notebooks that disintegrate when wet for the cypherpunks to write their keys in.
@evacide what about tongs instead? Wordpress already did thongs. EFF could be original and offer kitchenware
@evacide the internet on thongs.
@evacide you should do it on fake USB port stickers too
@evacide don't forget the bicycle bibs
@evacide
Hats that can play music, but the speakers are pointed outward, and they can only play royalty free music that's built in and can't be changed.
And it's charged via USB mini.
@evacide Finally, merch that makes people say EFF yeah! A thong is just a tote bag with smaller storage options. 😂
@evacide fingerless gloves.
OR those gloves that have a fingerless section and a fold over section. But the fold over fingertips are electrically insulated
OR those gloves that have a fingerless section and a fold over section. But the fold over fingertips are electrically insulated
@evacide track pants that say “EFF” on the butt?
@evacide A sheer t-shirt where only the letters EFF preserve modesty.
@evacide US or Australian thongs?
@evacide socks with suspenders all the way up to a hat. Keep your socks and hat in place in even the strongest winds.
@evacide can you partner with Rusty Quill to make booty shorts that say “ceaseless watcher turn your gaze upon this wretched thing”?
@evacide tapes with the entire mailing list archive in UUCP format?
@evacide metal heat shields you can insert in the toaster alongside the bread, and toast the EFF logo onto a slice of bread.
@evacide For me thongs generate images of footwear first and are synonymous with flip flops.
@evacide all everyone ever makes is shirts, hoodies, tote bags and baseball caps. why not make socks? they're useful, good to have and you only need like 2 sizes.
(and if you're feeling fancy, make skirts with pockets)
@evacide I love the EFF and have financially supported it for decades. But so much of the swag and designs have been ugly AF (not all of it). That is not what I contribute for, so it is OK.
@not2b Not everything is for everyone. Sometimes we make shirts and hoodies that are not black and I generally skip them.
@evacide I realize black is probably the safest option for swag but I'd love more fun bright color options! The current green motherboard hoodie is nice. +1 for non-standard merch items too.
@evacide 99% Invisible do swim suits, because they thought it was a terrible idea, but all the staff wanted them
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