@Alice

ha - what are you even talking about?

who says there's a body in this bag?

you can't prove anything.

okay, maybe there's some parts in there, but that's all!

oh - look at the time!

@Alice my 14 yo: "Wait... Then is a humanitarian crisis when there's too many cannibals or not enough people?"

@Alice Ask Joe Pesci about pescatarians.

@Alice You're close but just a little bit off. A humanitarian is someone who only eats Humana employees.

https://www.humana.com/

@Alice yes

@Alice They eat fish too, but not vegans

@Alice "You are what you eat."

@Alice,

It was hard to be a vegetarian who had to pick bits of meat out of her teeth in the morning. She was definitely on top of it, though. Definitely, she reassured herself. It was Angua’s mind that prowled the night, not a werewolf mind. She was almost entirely sure of that. A werewolf wouldn’t stop at chickens, not by a long way. She shuddered. Who was she kidding? It was easy to be a vegetarian by day, It was preventing yourself becoming a humanitarian at night that took the real effort.

— “Feet of Clay” (Terry Pratchett)

@Alice @tayfonay 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@Alice

if you only eat vegetarians, doesn't that make you a vegetarian too?

@Alice Yes! And I'm authoritarian.

@Alice Ppl aren't ready to talk about how consensual cannibalism is more ethical than carnism

#Cannibalism #Carnism #Speciesism

@Alice I’m not falling for this again.

@Alice I'M A SITUATIONAL HUMANITARIAN. IT'S LIKE LIVING ON GAS STATION FOOD.

@Alice @SRDas I feel like this is a trick question.

@Alice Interesting thought!!

@Alice
Allegedly, your honor

@Alice No that's a Republican.

@Alice Aye.

@Alice

@Alice

Mmmm hooman

@Alice Yes and they are quite tasty. (don't eat the old ones they can be a bit chewy)

@Alice Egalitarians only eat eagles, also a disgusting practice.

interesting question @Alice!

whilst not my area of expertise, these are my 2¢ after googling shit:

cannibalism = eating the living tissue of the same species from any of the kingdoms of life.

edit re:

https://beige.party/@Gorfram/115625334242029556

cannibalism = eating the tissue of the same species from any of the kingdoms of life.

@Gorfram

The kingdoms of life are Animals, Plants, Fungi, Protists, and Monera.

humanitarianism = eating human flesh without killing anyone.

i made a diagram to hopefully clarify this:

edit 2 re:

https://aus.social/@whybird/115627001635707555

diagram modified:

@whybird

i would also be interested in @glasspusher's consideration on this matter.

@Alice of course.

And Bob tastes particularly delicious this thanksgiving

@Alice

Someone who ALSO eats humans? Like, I'll have a soup and a Hum-burger... or something like that.

@Alice

That's what I thought!

@Alice Indeed, and a cannibal eats only cannonballs

@Alice I'm a vegetarian, but I also eat bread and cheese, so I guess humanitarians can have a nice sandwich.

@Alice yes but only if they're free-range

@Alice

too much logic will devour us all!! 😭

@Alice no

@Alice

🎵 🎵 🎵 🎵 🎵
People
People who eat
People
Are the hungriest people
In the world
🎵 🎵 🎵 🎵 🎵

@Alice ethically sourced, of course