so remember that poll i did yesterday about mailing the haematologist? thank you to everyone who replied. just wait till you read the ultimate result! 🫠

i mailed her, said that i was wondering if she would still want to see me given that i already knew i couldn't take the standard treatments, etc., and that i didn't want to waste her time and was trying to check if the journey was worth it.

she replied to say that if i couldn't take the standard treatments, then i might not have the disease. the disease of which she'd never heard when my GP contacted her. the disease the diagnosis of which was in part confirmed BECAUSE i react to so many meds.

she then said that either way, if i can't take the meds, she can't help me and that she'd cancel the appointment. end of mail.

(i can't take the standard treatments either due to bad reactions or contraindications. for the sake of brevity, i didn't specify this, but maybe i should've. not like it would've made any difference: clearly all she does is hand out a standard complement of meds. which i can't take.)

i am crying and shaking and so upset and angry and i have no idea what to do. husband says it's just as well i mailed, because she sounds entirely dim and fucking useless. he's right, but equally, what tf now??

so, yeah. glad i mailed, i guess. not glad to be stuck here with no help and constantly, scarily worsening health.