Discussion
*sigh*
We have been playing these guys for precisely a billion years. And every single time we beat their ass except they managed to manufacture special teams points out of our mistakes - I have been on this earth for a half century almost and this has always been true to my knowledge.
So is it gonna surprise you when I tell you Michigan is going into halftime clinging to a 3 point lead hosting Iowa because - we allowed a 96 yard kickoff return? I fucking love and also hate college football.
I mean you would think at this point we'd come into these games going "Iowa is gonna get up to some shit in the return game, the punting game, some fucked up fake kick trick plays, it's coming, be ready for it, do not get beat for points!"
But apparently no. The kickoff return as a play in football is dying because it causes insaneo numbers of head injuries and somehow Michigan manages to give up a 99 yard kick return TD to Iowa anyway.
Fuck man this is supposed to be RELAXING!
Has Kurt Frentz even remotely yet discovered the beauty of the forward pass, or is he still trying and failing to create Tom Osborne East over at Iowa with all those corn-fed 270 lb beefeaters up front?
@AnthonyJK They literally run a basketball on grass screen passing game now. So they pass about 10 more times a game than they did - but every pass is either behind the LoS or a 3 yard slant. It's fucking excruciating to watch and I have no idea why Iowa fans haven't revolted.
Like, I swear to god Iowa plays for a 0 to 0 tie against us and just *knows* we're gonna muff a punt, screw up a cover, fumble the ball and they'll score anyway.
And it burns my fucking ass that they're right. Their whole scoring offense is "you'll take the dummy candy because you're a fuckup" and we oblige them every time. We still usually win, but I damn near stroke out every Saturday we play them.
(Naw I mean if you watch the return we just don't get him. Iowa blocks us up good for sure, but the guy isn't that fast, and he only makes one cut and just goes the yard. So yeah Iowa OFTEN invests more time in special teams than other teams do, it's part of their identity, but that's not why this happened. This happened because we took the dummy candy - one of Michigan's defenders went to the ball instead of his lane and when the returner cut back it was daylight and holy ground ahead of him.)
Please just let Underwood throw the ball, I can't watch one of our running backs go right up the backside of his guard for zero yards any more today...
See?
((14:15) Shotgun #19 B.Underwood pass complete short right to #3 A.Marsh caught at IOWA47, for 22 yards to the IOWA42 (#3 J.Watson; #33 C.Buffington), 1ST DOWN)
Fucking holding inside the 20. So much for "the adults are back in the room."
Come on man, you can't give the fucking game away like this.
Are you fucking kidding me? Interception on 3rd and 11 at their 22? Jesus fucking christ what are we doing out there?
Like, Iowa has one way to beat us:
Win the field position game, score on special teams, generate turnovers.
And we're throwing away points, essentially in the red zone, to try a 3rd and 11 play instead of just kicking it.
Someone tell the weird Mormon Nazi coaching this team that this ain't the Mountain West Conference and you can't do that shit here.
Thank christ Iowa is to offensive football what "rolling around in pig shit" is to bodily hygiene because they had precisely a zero percent chance of making us pay for that mistake with points.
But this shit adds up. This is the game Iowa wants to play. You can't give them 3 free points and a chance to punt you back like that.
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They have 77 yards of offense. Total. It's 10-7. Did we piss off the longsnapper god or something? How the fuck does this KEEP happening for DECADES?