“I got a dark matter cat.”
“A whatnow?!”
“It’s a cat, but it only interacts via the weak force. And gravity of course”
“What’s the point of that?”
“Hypo allergenic. I can’t have normal cats or i sneeze constantly”
“But what can it do”
“Sits on my lap and emits soothing gravity purrs.”
“Nice, I guess”
“Oh and occasionally induces radioactive decay in objects on the coffee table.”