"What is the meaning of this?" King Arthur demanded.
"We swore an oath," Lancelot said, "to aid damsels and accept their quests."
Galahad nodded. "I met a lady who requested free universal healthcare."
"Basic universal income," Percival added.
"And universal suffrage," Bors said.
The princess left a note behind, explaining why she ran away.
"She disagrees with what she was taught," the queen said.
"Embroidery and such?" chuckled the king. "Classic."
"It's not needle-work she objects to. She likes that. She rejects the nobility of these nobility, and our right to rule."
The princess left a note behind, explaining why she ran away.
"She disagrees with what she was taught," the queen said.
"Embroidery and such?" chuckled the king. "Classic."
"It's not needle-work she objects to. She likes that. She rejects the nobility of these nobility, and our right to rule."
"Right," the professor said.
A bubble formed over her head, with the word neatly written in uppercase letters.
"I invented this to make it easier for students with hearing issues."
A new bubble formed, with that sentence.
Then a third formed, with wobbly border and the text "Unfortunately..."
"Right," the professor said.
A bubble formed over her head, with the word neatly written in uppercase letters.
"I invented this to make it easier for students with hearing issues."
A new bubble formed, with that sentence.
Then a third formed, with wobbly border and the text "Unfortunately..."
"Do you know where I can look up Frungal's Extractor?"
The magic school librarian sighed. "That grimoire is locked away."
"Why?"
"That spell extracts your anxieties and fears and turns them into a creature."
"Yes! To slay!"
"In theory. In practice, nobody can slay the new pet they created."
"Do you know where I can look up Frungal's Extractor?"
The magic school librarian sighed. "That grimoire is locked away."
"Why?"
"That spell extracts your anxieties and fears and turns them into a creature."
"Yes! To slay!"
"In theory. In practice, nobody can slay the new pet they created."
My storage-bladder clutched the loot tighter as I sprinted for the airlock and my stochastic parrot started posting dire survival probabilities on the body-bus.
The recent mods I'd made for the job had pros and cons. On the one hand the ablative scales on my back did a wonderful job dealing with incoming energy and ballistic fire, on the other hand all that shit was weighing me down and I couldn't get into my usual groove. I was way too slow and I would die.
"Fuck it, fire at will."
As soon as the free-for-all message was on the bus all hell broke loose. My third arm took control of the cam, overrode its own power and projectile budget and went to town on anything that moved and was not me. Nutrient-transport fluids and excrement splashed on the walls behind me.
The locomotion subsystem erased all wear protection on joints and connected tissues. With a jolt (and a lot of cracks and creaks) my body was launched towards the door.
Eris, my delightfully named security subsystem, unlocked all of our precious zero days and started burning out any system stupid enough to still accept any incoming comms.
"Not the DOOR, Eris!"
"I'm having fun, I'm not stupid 
."
I flew through the door and broke some carapace as I slammed into the back wall of the airlock. The door closed with a lot more force than allowed by regulation and instead of a soft disengagement I had to hold on for dear life as the emergency detach bolts exploded.
I dropped on the floor. Smiling. Nothing like a good near-death experience to make you feel alive.
I could hear faint sobbing from Excel, the new accountant AI as it tallied the cost for burnt exploits.
My storage-bladder clutched the loot tighter as I sprinted for the airlock and my stochastic parrot started posting dire survival probabilities on the body-bus.
The recent mods I'd made for the job had pros and cons. On the one hand the ablative scales on my back did a wonderful job dealing with incoming energy and ballistic fire, on the other hand all that shit was weighing me down and I couldn't get into my usual groove. I was way too slow and I would die.
"Fuck it, fire at will."
As soon as the free-for-all message was on the bus all hell broke loose. My third arm took control of the cam, overrode its own power and projectile budget and went to town on anything that moved and was not me. Nutrient-transport fluids and excrement splashed on the walls behind me.
The locomotion subsystem erased all wear protection on joints and connected tissues. With a jolt (and a lot of cracks and creaks) my body was launched towards the door.
Eris, my delightfully named security subsystem, unlocked all of our precious zero days and started burning out any system stupid enough to still accept any incoming comms.
"Not the DOOR, Eris!"
"I'm having fun, I'm not stupid ."
I flew through the door and broke some carapace as I slammed into the back wall of the airlock. The door closed with a lot more force than allowed by regulation and instead of a soft disengagement I had to hold on for dear life as the emergency detach bolts exploded.
I dropped on the floor. Smiling. Nothing like a good near-death experience to make you feel alive.
I could hear faint sobbing from Excel, the new accountant AI as it tallied the cost for burnt exploits.
"So, do you have a quest," the witch asked as she finished dressing the last wound, "or doing general adventuring?"
"A quest. I seek a book."
"Ancient tome of forbidden lore?"
"No, one I read as a child."
"And this dragon didn't have it?"
"Alas."
"Have you asked a librarian?"
"They're scary!"
"So, do you have a quest," the witch asked as she finished dressing the last wound, "or doing general adventuring?"
"A quest. I seek a book."
"Ancient tome of forbidden lore?"
"No, one I read as a child."
"And this dragon didn't have it?"
"Alas."
"Have you asked a librarian?"
"They're scary!"
Some asteroids were mined for minerals, methane or water, some served as truck stops for traffic between the outer and inner planets.
Some of those became destinations in their own right, like asteroid 52692. Covered in hydroponic tuber farms, it was the home of the famous Scalzi Space Potato.
Some asteroids were mined for minerals, methane or water, some served as truck stops for traffic between the outer and inner planets.
Some of those became destinations in their own right, like asteroid 52692. Covered in hydroponic tuber farms, it was the home of the famous Scalzi Space Potato.
a former student wrote to me... they were on a class I used to teach a year or two ago. (it was 'phased out'...) and they produced a couple of tracks during that class and did some for an assessment, and now they have recorded an album. -and they sent it to me, and that made me so happy.
If I had some small part, even in just affirming any of their efforts, that makes it all worth it.
When the aliens made contact, we learned they had observed us for millennia.
"Yes. We installed the magic soak on your moon around your 500BCE."
"The what?"
"To drain the natural magic, so you would focus on technology instead. But we have turned it off now."
"Teach us!"
"Er..."
"You owe us!"
